| Here's the enigma of the barbecue grill..... | | | | elementary grill recipes. |
| Two customers have complained today and one of | | | | If I were applying for a job as a car mechanic which |
| my suppliers just isn't providing the quality of | | | | garage in their right mind would take me on? Yet |
| materials that I need. In short it's been a rough day | | | | armed with the most appalling gastronomic CV I'm |
| "at the office". I'm a bit down in the dumps but as | | | | trusted not to poison the family and if that weren't |
| soon as I get home and my heart lifts. My children | | | | enough, we invite our best friends round in the |
| greet me and are itching to tell me all about their day | | | | honest belief that I won't poison them too! |
| and there's a wonderful smell of cooking coming from | | | | Ever been to a BBQ cookout where the hamburgers |
| the kitchen. | | | | are burnt on the outside and frozen in the middle? |
| I give my wife a hug and ask "Hey, what's cooking?" | | | | I'm sorry to say that while we might have moved |
| Tonight will be oven roasted chicken thighs on a bed | | | | someway towards modern man with the |
| of vegetables roasted in olive oil. A ciabatta loaf is | | | | housekeeping duties, we're still eons away when it |
| warming in the oven and there's a bottle of merlot | | | | comes to the barbecue grill or meat smoker. |
| open to breathe on the kitchen table to round it all | | | | Now it has to be said that lighting the barbecue is |
| off. What better way to start the evening? | | | | definitely a man's job. C'mon guys who doesn't like |
| I know without any further inspection that what my | | | | playing with fire? So how ladies, do you eat safe in |
| nose tells me smells good really is good simply | | | | the knowledge that you'll live until tomorrow? Well |
| because my wife has many years experience, she | | | | I've got one simple barbecue tip:- |
| enjoys cooking and therefore knows the subject | | | | Give him the matches and the firelighters but don't |
| inside out. | | | | give him any of the food - at least not for 45 |
| OK so I may be taking it a little to the extreme to | | | | minutes if charcoal, 15 minutes if gas. Believe me, if |
| make the point and before you all start hollering | | | | you bring it out any earlier it'll be a cremation rather |
| back, let me point out that I do my family's ironing | | | | than a BBQ party. |
| and I clean the bathrooms so I'm part way from | | | | My tip for good food is gentle cooking, heat is good |
| "Neanderthal" to "modern man". I'm sure there's | | | | and flames are bad. Fat dripping onto the coals |
| plenty of us out there, sincerely I hope so. | | | | creates the smoke that flavours the food but that |
| My point is that considering all this talent my wife has | | | | same fat also can cause flames if the coals haven't |
| and all her experience at cooking, why is it that when | | | | been allowed to settle. So in short, the coals should |
| it's time for a BBQ cookout it's me that takes on the | | | | be hot and the flames not. |
| grill duties? The man of the house! What qualifications | | | | How do you keep your man away from the food |
| do I have? How much experience do I have?......... | | | | without a padlock and chain on the refrigerator door? |
| Zip....Nada...Niente! I can't even follow the most | | | | Give him a beer......or two! After all - I am a man! |